Self-Esteem and Style
In this article, I’m going to share my story and thoughts about the connection between self-esteem and style.
In my early 20s, I almost committed suicide. I realized how deeply depressed I was, how ugly I felt, and how much I hated myself.
I was taught to feel worthless. My relatives were screaming at me how much they hated me and wanted to get rid of me, and there were many other kinds of abuse. It lasted my entire childhood and the beginning of my youth.
So in my early 20s, at that moment of horrible pain, when I almost killed myself, I decided that was going to be a turning point. I am going to grow self-love and self-esteem. One day at a time.
I've learned that there are two ways to love the aspects of myself. To accept and enjoy it or to change it. If I can't accept something about myself, maybe even for years, it is often worth changing. I visit my clairvoyant/therapist before making any serious decisions. If I can't change the aspect that is bugging me, it means that it’s a situation I have to go through. Even if it will take a lifetime to learn to love this part of me, I started this journey as soon as possible. Silently hating it makes my life worse. I tell myself, “Ok, it is what it is. I’m giving up on hating it, I’m so very tired of this fight. My endurance and strength allow me to fight through and be happy, even with this. In the end, it's just a part of me, I am much more than this problem. And I give my tender love to this physical/mental/health-related part of me”.
I was able to relax my mind about my uniqueness. Crying, accepting it once I ran out of tears and energy to suffer about it. Then finding ways to be happy.
And one of them was fashion.
Wearing certain clothing and accessories is an ancient way to show status, create certain energy, and basically feel amazing. Dressing not for changing yourself but for self-expression - it is a big difference. This is where loving your own body and mind is needed. Be brave to show who you are. Not stressing out about the look but just being honest, and of course very beautiful. Hide and show what you want for you, regardless of trends or opinions.
I was able to grow my self-esteem from below zero and I decided to encourage people who appreciate my art to explore and love themselves more as well. One item at a time.
Here are my tips for self-love.
Growing self-esteem starts at home when you’re alone in the room. Naked, and then dressed. What we feel by ourselves is what we carry wherever we go, with our outfits as well.
Hug, even kiss yourself daily.
Smile and charm yourself in the mirror, flirt with yourself. Dressed or naked
Throw away everything that makes you feel sad or cheap. Doesn't mean items that you leave in the wardrobe have to be expensive. It's about the vibe. And it is very important to throw away the items that carry bad memories, even if they look good.
Wear something that is one step further than your current mind state - more cool/fancy/controversial/happy/relaxed/worthy...
Better quality things make everyone feel better. Let the garments serve your body and soul. And sometimes, even if garments are uncomfortable but it reflects what you feel, it is worth the torture:)
Fashion is an amazing way to learn about your life. Look at your outfits in the older pictures and analyze what you were feeling at those times according to your style.
Take a bath in a crown. And high heels, if you like them.
Buy yourself gifts. Big, small- doesn’t matter. Even if it’s just a thing you need anyway, propose it to yourself as an important gift. And I’m always here for you if you need goods with a self-esteem boost included!
Bye-bye, love you,
Stay stylish, it’s healthy and it makes you happy :)
* This striped tie is created from scarf LOVE IS FREE.